“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.” - Marcus Aurelius
To help us put a positive foot forward, we need to understand the consequence of some of the human conditions under which we live. One of the most significant problems facing humanity is how we deal with negative thinking, depression, suicidal thoughts, and addiction.
Below we cover these topics and show you how to deal with them effectively. This information has been placed here to help those of us who are suffering from these issues right now, as well as to protect you from future harm. You can also use this knowledge to help your people when they have trouble.
What You Really Want
The fact is you do not want to feel depressed, have negative thoughts and feelings, or kill yourself. What you really want is to be happy and have a wonderful life. What you really want is to overcome depression, an attachment to negative thoughts, suicidal thoughts, and all the rest, so it takes you farther down your “True Path” toward your “True Self” and “True Life.”
What are Depression & Suicidal Thoughts?
Depression is a prolonged period of feeling sadness, hopeless, worry, and despair. These are negative feelings that are persistent and may feel like they will never go away. Suicidal Thoughts are a response to these intense negative feelings that we think or feel we cannot continue to bear.
Negative feelings are things like feeling sad, hopeless, desperate, lonely, fearful, worried, distrustful, ashamed, hated, hateful, worthless, desperate, enraged, reckless, unmotivated, or even suicidal. Note that each of these negative feelings naturally has a positive opposite.
It’s also important to know that you are not alone and that the majority of us would like to be appreciated and admired for something good, yet we are often overly critical of ourselves. We all have weaknesses yet want to learn to compensate for them. We have unused capacity and skills that are not turned to our advantage.
We all sometimes or often doubt that we have made the right decisions or choices and wish for more clarity. We can hold ourselves together, but at times, can be worried and insecure on the inside. We can be a very independent thinker yet sometimes accept questionable things without proof. Most of us would like some positive change in life; however, we are hemmed in by restrictions and limitations of our own making.
First, you don’t want to kill yourself, feel depressed, or think negatively. Next, the definition of depression and negative thinking clearly shows us the crux of the issue and leads us to the solution. The fact is harsh negative feelings over time lead to a downward spiral ending in suicidal thoughts.
Effect of Negative Feelings
All feelings are different mixtures of chemicals our body releases in response to something. Extreme negative feelings come from a specific combination of chemicals that, in the short term, can help motivate us, create focus, and can provide energy. However, this cascade of detrimental chemicals over time will do damage to us mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Negative feelings can create a physical reaction like feeling a tightness in your chest or an upset stomach, inflammation, clenching, restlessness, and sleeplessness, all of which add to the problem.
Positive feelings have the opposite effect. Positive emotions help improve all aspects of our health, including eating, sleeping habits, energy levels, motivation, and more. Positive feelings even flush out the harmful chemicals caused by depression and negative thinking.
What Causes Negative Feelings?
Generally, negative feelings are caused by 1 or any combination of 3 situations.
- Negative Self Judgment: You have a negative belief about yourself.
- Negative Happenings: You have negative beliefs concerning things that either have happened, might happen, or will happen to you, your loved ones, or in your society or world.
- Negative Place: If the environment in which you find yourself is depressing, unpleasant, or not conducive, it creates negative feelings. Sometimes depression is caused by this lacking in our home life and society. In these cases, especially when extreme, you must focus on getting help and making things better. This focus is important because HOPE is a very positive force that can get things moving in the right direction, even against the toughest of odds. See “Step 6: Unite” for more on how you can help change negative places into positive ones.
Why Does This Happen?
Intense negative feelings, thoughts, and even depression and suicidal thoughts are normal and natural and are here for a reason. Most of you have had or will have times when you are hurt deeply in one way or another. Most of you can see there is a wrongness in our world, and sometimes it gets to you. You are human.
What you are experiencing is a human conditional effect. The fact is in this universe, positive needs negative and vice versa. We have seen this expressed throughout the ages as yin and yang. Within this universe, feeling bad means you can feel good, seeing the wrong means you can make it right. Our challenge as a species is to realize that the great gift of being able to see and fix the wrongness was given to us for a reason. It’s our action or lack thereof regarding this gift that determines much of our fate/destiny.
Negative feelings are designed to make us focus on something, to learn, and give us energy so we can deal with it and solve the problem(s). If we handle it correctly, these situations develop skills that can make us better people, create a better society, as well as expose all the wrongness.
The fact is that someone has gone through something like you are at some point in history. There are many examples of people who turned a small or great wrongness, tragedy, or hardship into good. Turning the negative into the positive and good is what you really want to do. The key is to know that you can prevent and overcome negative thinking, depression, and suicidal thoughts (NTDST) as well as negative addiction.
To be clear, it’s our belief in negative thoughts that create “negative feelings.” We find the key in the word belief.
How to Overcome NTDST
So, if believing in the negative is what causes the problem, then how do you get what you really want instead of being self-destructive during these desperately challenging times of life? Your challenge is to find a way to know the issue, learn, find solutions, and move on in a positive way. As we have noted, NTDST is tied to our shared human condition. The wrongness of life and the trials you go through generally focus on three areas: self-control, self-creation, and societal development.
The fact is that negative feelings are a mixture of chemicals your body released in response to your belief, and they will do damage to you over the long term. Since we build habits in about 90 days, we need a solution that works fast, and that will also work even if we have developed a negative habit.
Understanding what was just covered makes the solution clearer. You must have specific thoughts, believe them, and then take certain actions over time to overcome NTDST. So, what are these key thoughts to believe and actions to take? There are a number of them. The key is to know them all for together they make a total solution.
Bad things happen. You may have a negative thought, have horrible things happen to you, your loved ones, and in our world. You might be in a terrible place or have done something very wrong. It might be that what you think is a big deal is actually nothing. Whatever the issue, you do not run from it, push it down, or deny it. You also don’t languish in your dealings with it. You need to face it, deal with it, and then move on.
So first take the time and really look at it and deal with it. You are allowing yourself to think the thoughts and feel that pain and sadness. Is it the truth? Sometimes, when you focus on what you are depressed about, you find they are meaningless, superficial things, and they evaporate quickly.
If this situation is tied to a loss of someone or another great event, you may also need time to grieve and be in this moment. So, take some time but don’t languish too long. All good people would always want you to learn, recover, and move on to have a wonderful life. So, face it, and let yourself feel what needs to be felt, make amends if need be, for this will allow you to move on faster.
Now that you have faced it and are going through it, the next key is to look for the lessons, challenges, and tests that you can find (See the “Life Manual: Our Practice: Mental Practice: Learning” for more.) These insights might be in the form of a list of things not to do or to do. It might be some essential point or change that needs to happen within your life or society.
Here you are looking for perspectives and paths where you can change this event into either being nothing because it was meaningless or being something that you can learn from and become better. You need to ask yourself, what are all the things that you can do to get through this transitional moment of life that would make you better? Write these things down as they can be used to improve yourself, find direction as well as implement solutions. See “Step 5 Be: Time: Transitional Phases of Life & Trying Times” for more.
In the end, regardless of what you are feeling depressed about, these feelings are caused by a specific belief. You can think about anything and believe what you want. It can help to believe that all situations like this are character tests and challenges as well as spirit building exercises, that once understood and are past can't hurt you anymore or at least will be bearable.
You can use these situations to make things better or let them destroy you. The solution is tied to your choice in thinking, belief, and actions. All the trials that you overcome will become victories and an endless source of positive energy that you can use for good and during the other trials of life. See the “Life Manual: Our Practice” for more.
Know Change is Guaranteed
The next key is to know that we all live in a world of change where nothing stays the same. Entropy is part of our human condition. Change is happening right now as time passes. You will not be like this forever. It may seem overwhelming in this transitional moment. Nevertheless, this too shall pass, and you don’t know what will happen.
When people say, “it’s darkest before the dawn,” they do not mean this literally, as it’s not true in our world. Darkest before the dawn means that at the bleakest and hopeless time, there is something that could happen to change everything for the positive. This is hope. The critical insight here is that if you do a good job following all the solutions found within this section, as time passes, you are creating the positive change that will get you to where you want to go.
See The Way Out
While you are facing it, learning lessons and know that change is guaranteed, you still need to know the way out. Here you need only find the desire for NTDST to end. This desire can come in the form of wishing this situation did not exist or that it never happened. This desire for it to stop allows you to make choices and take actions where you are mindful of the moment, working on the solutions and not focusing on the problem.
It’s this sincere desire for this situation to end that becomes the starting point that you can use to get to a better place. It's like a bread crumb trail for it’s through your desire for something to end that something new can start. It’s this desire for the positive that leads you to make new choices and take different actions.
Knowing that change is guaranteed and that your desire will lead to the way out if your thoughts and actions are correct during the process still means you need the power to make it happen.
Know Your Power
What is the power you need? Say your best friend contacts you and says, “(insert loved one’s name) was just hit by a car and taken to the hospital, and I don’t know if they are going to live.” How would you feel at that moment?
Maybe you feel devastated, afraid for them, worried, sad, and desperate? Then they say…ha, just joking. What do you feel now? You certainly might be mad at the person for that mean joke, but you also don’t feel devastated, worried, or sad as you did a moment before.
In fact, all those negative feelings just fade away in an instant. You may even feel good. Here you can have the same thought or see the same thing that caused negative feelings, yet now you feel nothing or even positive about it. So, what happened? The context changed or to say it another way, “change happened.”
- You believed a thought (thought 1).
- Then you had another thought and believed it instead (thought 2).
Think about it like this. When you had an intense or bad dream that you woke up from, you were able to go from an instant state of panic or fear to believe that the dream was not true and then go right back to sleep.
These extreme examples are being used to illustrate how this basic human process works. Understanding the workings is very important because it works the same way in all situations, including depression and negative thinking. It’s the chain of belief, unbelief, and a new belief that allows us to overcome NTDST. Even if you are truly oppressed, you can think what you want. No matter what you show on the outside, you can keep a part of you safe and for yourself.
Use Your Power
You have the power to think something, then change your feelings through your belief. Therefore, if you think and believe the right things, you can turn the negative into not existing or into good feelings. Here you are turning a negative into positive.
For example, you can use this energy created by these negative times as a catalyst to create positive change. Others have turned great problems, tragedies, and hardships into good, and so can you. It’s possible that you can even come through this better than you were before or do some great good.
You can use your power of belief to change yourself in this very moment, and any time you truly believe. You can see any issue as a life challenge, lesson, or test that you are to learn from so you can become better. No good person would want you to suffer; they would want you to rise. You can only become better if you let yourself. Simply believe you have the power and then use it as needed anytime. See the “Life Manual: Our Practice: The Power” for more.
If you are having a hard time, don’t stop, or you will end up there. To put it another way, if your current path has led you into hell, don’t stop, keep going and make it through for if you stop, you will stay in hell. As stated, you can see any negative situation as a significant life challenge that, once overcome, will mean you are stronger and better for it. It might be hard to see it at the time, but afterward, it will become clear. Just do what needs to be done and move on. No guilt.
Moving on does not mean the situation is ok, desirable, or even acceptable. It does not mean that it was right and that you agree or even that it's over. You can be hurt, damaged, and even broken. Moving on means that you are dealing with it in a positive way and healing. Remember, all good people want you to recover, learn, and move on. So, punishing yourself is not the answer. Punishing yourself unduly does not right any wrongs or make a positive difference. In fact, it makes a bad situation worse. Only making peace and taking positive action will accomplish the real goal.
Help People & Get Help
Unite with other people in positive ways. We all have needs that cannot be fulfilled entirely on our own. You need people to help you become your best. You can look for support groups where people are going through the same or similar things, coaches, trainers, and other positive activities where you will find positive people.
If there aren't any groups like that, look for any group helping people with trauma. They might be able to help. The participation and camaraderie with others can help you greatly. You might help others who are going through something similar. You might find that helping others actually helps you too. You might also join a group doing something positive and fun that you enjoy. Find your people, your tribe, and they will help lessen your load as well as enable you to reach higher levels.
Bond with Animals & Nature
Both animals and nature can be a significant positive boost. For example, A dog, if treated well, is always glad to see you and is an excellent source of joy. Being in a beautiful natural environment can lift your mood by merely sensing it. Plants around your living space can bring in a sense of peace. Our bountiful world is a never-ending source of good feelings and positive energy. Bring it inside and get out there and enjoy it!
Belief in God, knowing you have a purpose and are here for a reason is also a great resource. Remember, you are never alone, always connected with God, and that God is your friend. The meetings, ceremonies, rituals associated with a positive faith can help you through hard times.
Fix Our Society
As you have learned, some of our society is broken, and this wrongness can create negative feelings. Here, even in the most desperate places, you can have a positive effect by working to fix these problems. Your good works can help you recover and move on. Hope and positive action are very powerful and lead to the implementation of real solutions. Hope is also a great source of positive energy that lifts people up. Many of us are willing to sacrifice to fix big problems. Through hope and action, we can improve generation by generation. The more of us who join together, the easier it is to fix significant societal issues. So, get out there and help fix something, you might find you also fixed yourself.
Replace Repetitive Negativity with the Positive
You don’t stop or do without; instead, you replace and crowd out with something good. This constant positive focus is an essential point for you to realize. You are not trying to stop any negative thing.
For example, you don’t try to quit smoking. Instead, you live a healthy lifestyle.
The focus is not on stopping the negative; it’s doing the positive. Focus on the solution. Choose what defines you. Living rational, positive action in all critical areas of life naturally crowds out and immunizes you against negative thinking, depression, and suicidal thoughts.
So, if you catch yourself thinking something negative, immediately say something positive like an affirmation instead. You can even pick affirmations that are the opposite of what you were thinking. If you have a negative thought, you don't have to agree. Fighting against them, denying them, countering them with something positive can be effective in changing your belief system. You can think of it like your subconscious is testing you, and it's your answer back that matters. Do you agree and accept the negative or do you reject it and throw it back, replacing it with love and goodness?
For example, you do something wrong and say, “I’m such an idiot.” You answer back. “No, I am not. I am working hard, just made an error is all, to err is human after all. I am learning and will do better the next time, so keep that negative unconstructive comments to yourself because they have no place here.”
The same attitude applies to worry. To worry is to be anxious about something that may have happened or may occur in the future. Worry is here to help us focus, prevent and fix issues if possible. It’s a damaging and fruitless behavior when there is nothing to be done. It's detrimental, as is all negative thinking, because it releases harmful chemicals in your body and occupies your thoughts and actions. It's fruitless because it does not affect what may or will happen. Instead of worry, replace it with something positive like a positive action to prevent or help, a creative act, a mind game, cleaning, or working out. After you have done what you could, you can realize it’s meaningless, a bad habit, and then drop it and go on with your life.
Follow The Way
The Way is “Living Rational Positive Action” and is designed to help you find and create a meaningful life. It enables you to fix and focus all aspects of your life in positive ways. The primary virtues that help us all overcome NTDST are to be positive, hopeful, peaceful, happy, optimistic, grateful, humble, mindful, resilient, persevering, disciplined, determined, persistent, dedicated, motivated, productive, responsible, controlled, centered, and patient.
Living The Way every day over time will ingrain these key virtues and others into you. All of which will allow you to overcome challenges, and the trials of life naturally. These virtues will fortify and immunize you against negative thinking, depression, and suicidal thoughts. The younger you build these critical coping skills, the better you will do during these transitional moments of life, for you will be prepared for life's ups and downs. See the Child & Family Guide for more.
While the whole of The Way will help, here are some things to focus on fast. The first key is to follow a complete “Daily Way” that covers all the foundations because keeping on top of all these foundational areas allows for a smoother transitional period. See “Step 5: Be” and “The Manual of Life” for more. Take special care with:
- Physical Workouts: A good workout can lift a mood because it releases positive chemicals that make you feel better. It also washes out the harmful chemicals. Increasing the intensity and frequency of “Your Practice” in all areas, mental and physical, can be very helpful.
So be sure to do some good longer workouts that wear you out and allow you to sweat, just don’t push too hard and hurt yourself. You can use your workout to help keep you balanced, as well as, when you are at your lowest, to get a lift. See the “Life Manual: Our Practice” for more.
- Sleep: Sleep is your time to escape, recover, and heal. See the “Life Manual: Sleep” to get the best.
- Fuels: Fueling your body correctly with “Light, Air, Water, Food, and Information” during these times can go a long way to helping improve everything. See the “Life Manual: Fuels” for more.
- Supplements: St John's Wort, The HTP5, KAVA, correct levels of Vit B and amino acids - all can help promote a better mood. For more, see the “Life Manual: Sleep: Other Sleep Aids.”
- Transmutation: Use transmutation to change negative energy into positive. See the “Life Manual: Our Practice: The Power: Transmutation” for more.
- Meditation: The mental practice part of “Our Practice” includes meditation. Increasing the frequency and session length of meditation during these times can be very helpful. Going through all the different techniques is an excellent way to get and stay on track. See the “Life Manual: Our Practice: Mental Practice: Meditation” for more.
Other Parts of The Way that can help:
- Unite with Other People: This is mentioned above and here because of its importance. We all have the power to change the negative into the positive, and this is made even stronger when you join with other people.
Friends, family, support groups, and events are all ways you can join with others. To be truly successful, your best, happy, and to have a positive effect on significant issues, you must unite with other people. Joining with others allows us all to offer and receive happiness, help, motivation, inspiration, as well as participate in solutions.
- Moral Center: Understand the “10 Laws” covered in “Step 4: Center” in detail. There you find your purpose, the meaning of life, and more. Knowing all of this helps create a perspective on what is truly important, and this allows you to focus yourself appropriately.
Optional Help: Therapy & Drugs
The use of therapy and drugs are not a requirement or even a recommendation. This information is provided so that you know your options.
- Therapy: If you are having trouble handling things on your own, seek professional and volunteer help. There are toll-free phone numbers, groups, and doctors who specialize in helping people just like you.
There is no shame in this; sometimes, our minds need help just like our bodies do. So do not hesitate. If you need assistance, reach out. There are caring people ready to help you. Do not underestimate their abilities or your ability to get better, for often true healing can only take place with people who care.
Just be careful, some therapists, as with many doctors, only get paid if you continue to see them, so they may not be working to help you as fast as possible. Therefore, it's recommended that you seek treatments that work toward real solutions, and only for the shortest time as possible.
These sessions should be working to give you the power to control your own life and mind, ideally not create a dependency on the therapist. If you just need to talk over your life with people, to be validated, then make friends instead. It’s a lot cheaper and a lot more rewarding.
- Prescription Drugs: There are prescription drugs that claim to help with depression. Be wary of only treating symptoms with drugs. The caution here is that most prescription drugs often only mask symptoms and do not address the cause. The side effects can also be problematic on their own. They also can do other long-term harm and cause dependency. The problem is that you still have the underlying problem and are adding a drug dependency on top of it, so be careful and check the side effects.
- Natural Drugs: There are plants that humans have used throughout history that can help you gain a positive perspective at these trying times. Plants like marijuana, peyote, ayahuasca, and certain mushrooms are used at critical moments.
With all drugs, there are risks, and they all need to be understood before trying them. These are listed as options because of the fact many people suffering from PTSD, fears, loss, and other traumas have significantly benefited from the experiences associated with these substances and others like them.
The key is to use them as an experience, learn and integrate the learning into our life, not to use them all the time or to escape problems. If ever using them, be safe, do not smoke them if possible, and ensure that they are of the correct dose and have never been exposed to herbicides, insecticides, or other poisons.
The Solution Combination Summary
Know What You Really Want is to Recover, Be Your Best, and to be Happy then
1. Face It - Go through It
2. See the Lessons, Trials, Challenges. & Keys
3. Know Change is Guaranteed
4. See The Way Out - Your Desire for the Positive
5. Know Your Power - You Can Change Your Mind & Feelings
6. Use Your Power - Change to the Positive
7. Move On - Let it Go - No Regrets- No Guilt
8. Help People & Get Help
9. Bond with Nature & Animals
10. Have Faith - Hang Out with Your Friend God
11. Fix Society - Help Fix Thyself
12. Replace the Negative with the Positive
13. Follow The Way
14: Additional Options: Therapy & Drugs (Pharmaceutical/Natural)
7 Reasons Why Not to Kill Yourself
“Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.” - William James
Ok, now that we have covered the way to overcome this type of negativity, for those of you who are thinking about killing yourself, please consider these facts. These should also be shared with anyone you feel might be at risk.
- Because It’s Not What You Really Want: Read above. What you really want is for things to get better and to live a wonderful life. You don’t really want to kill yourself. Instead, seek to understand and follow the information above and within The Way.
- Because It's Not Needed: You don’t need to kill yourself because there is a way out. Change is guaranteed, and you have the power. See how above.
- Hurting Others: Know you will be hurting others who care for you. They will never get over it. It can even cause depression and suicidal thoughts in them. Do you really want to inflict that on people who care for you and that you love?
- No Good Person: No good person would want you to end your life. They want you to get better, move on, and live a wonderful life! This includes you! So, forgive and forget those who would want otherwise.
- Lost Love One? If this situation is caused by the death or loss of a loved one, even a child, know that the person would NOT want you to feel bad, hurt, or kill yourself because of them. Honor them by using the energy from the event to become a better person and do good in our world.
- Failure: If you try to kill yourself, it might not work, and you can end up worse off like be damaged mentally or physically, in jail or a mental institution.
- Faith: Most faiths put a penalty on suicide when not at deaths’ door. Fear of this negative consequence on this level should make any believer stop and reconsider.
In the end, you can learn the skills needed to overcome negative thinking, depression, and suicidal thoughts (NTDST) no matter your stage. Together we can work to create a better world that will naturally help us all avoid many of the situations that cause these problems.
Believe you have the power and deserve to move on. If you are looking for permanent change, look for help in The Way as the steps are designed to help you create positive change within your life throughout time.
Remember the keys: Think! Believe! and Act! You can do this!
Wishing you peace, happiness, and true success always!
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